You May Think It's Funny....But It's SNOT

Why have I had a head cold all week?

"Honey, take your lieberry card out of your 
mouth and give it to the lady!" 
Good grief.

Get Your Flu Shot

Swine flu is still out there so get your flu shot! It's a 3-parter this year but combined into one shot. Apparently, I'm too OLD to get the nasal spray. Pppbbttt!!!  Check out this site for some popular misconceptions about the flu shot. Remember: You can pick your nose. And you can pick your friends.  But you can't wipe your friends on the couch. Remember who told you that.

Tree Frog The Sequel: It's Not Safe To Go In The Back Yard

Damn yoouuu, Tree Frog! Why are you terrorizing me?? Only a few moments ago, I had my second encounter with the tree frogs living in the passion fruit vine outside my back door. If you remember, the little "cuties" kept affixing their sticky little bodies to the glass door and then flinging themselves at me when I'd open the door to let Sam out. The last time almost gave me a heart attack. I've taken to opening the door in "armed Ninja protection mode." Okay, so I crack the door with a towel over my head and hold a salad fork (you use what you've got). I think those frogs must be training the newly born froglets in a sort of miniature amphibian Jihadist attack camp aimed at giving me a seizure of some sort. The past few days I've noticed a new fellow on the door, albino, I think because instead of bright green, he's mostly white with just a splotch of green on his back. I just now opened the door for Sam and the little critter was staring at me from about 6" above eye level. I tried to shoo him away and...he HURLED himself at my head (much like seeing a flying squirrel in full spread formation launch himself from a tree at you) straight at my HEAD, landing in my HAIR. AAIIIIIIYYII!!! Now, let's pause and take this moment to imagine the frenetic gyrations I was able to perform in order to shake the sticky booger out of my hair. I'll have to imagine with you because the whole episode is a blur to me.  I vaguely remember screeching and flinging my head in and out of the curtains much like dancing the Hokey Pokey on acid. And at some point, there was a cold, wet, stickiness on my cheek. Unless someone pitched a pre-masticated GummiBear at my face, I'll assume it was Frogzilla. As for Sam, I think he watched me with detached interest for the first few minutes and... then left the room.  Finally, I saw the terrorist all splayed out on the side of the couch (in my mind it was the size of my open palm) and I was able to gather my wits about me enough to herd the Great White Amphibian out the door and back into the wild from which it came. Leapin' lizards!!  'Course, I'm sure the frog is at home now going, "Dude, you should have seen it, it was freakin' HUGE. And that hair could use some conditioner..."  Oh, sorry, I digressed.  Sam, I'm sorry but you're never going outside again.

Book Review: Killing Mr. Griffin

Each year, to celebrate Banned Book Week, I try to read a challenged book that I have not previously read. This year, I was intrigued by a selection that, the last time I checked, was #33 on the American Library Association's Most Frequently Banned Book List.  In case you're not familiar with this list, it contains books that have been challenged. According to the ALA, "a challenge is an attempt to remove or censor materials based upon the objections of a person or group. A successful challenge results in a ban." There are many reasons why a book can be challenged: inappropriate language, offensive terminology, plot inappropriate to age...the list goes on and on.  In effect: censorship. If you know anything about me, you can imagine how this makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. The ALA Office for Intellectual Freedom has recorded 7,000 challenges since 1990; over 500 in 2002 alone. Lot of closed minds out there.  And a LOT of sharp sticks where they shouldn't be.  So I not only discourage anyone from paying any heed to the warnings, I ENCOURAGE young readers to go of their way to read what people who think they know what's best for us DON'T want us to read. "Read irresponsibly" is my new favorite mantra.  So, this year I read Lois Duncan's Killing Mr. Griffin. This one has been around since 1978 and was ALA's Best Book for Young Adults in 1978 and 1994. The plot is what caused parents to freak out, and to be fair, I can sort of see why. A group of social fringe teens get mad at their English teacher and plot to kidnap him to scare him into giving them easier assignments. They rope in a nerdy girl who doesn't really share their grievances but agrees to help in order to be accepted.  Old, old themes. Teen angst, teens trying to fit in, teens being stupid and using poor judgment.  Unfortunately, the plan goes wonky when Mr. Griffin unexpectedly dies from a heart ailment that goes unmedicated during the kidnapping.  There's a few curse words but nothing most teens haven't heard before 10 o'clock in the morning. Of course, the problem is the plot. The parents who challenged this book were afraid that reading about killing a teacher might put the idea into their children's brains and mayhem would ensue.  I think kids are much more sophisticated (and smarter) than that. I WAS a teen in 1978, and although some twisted individuals might have entertained the idea after reading this, come on...it's not a NEW concept. Who *hasn't* been so angry at someone that you wished they would die? Not literally, but disappear from your life?  Okay, maybe it's just me. But no work of fiction can *make* anyone who is not already predisposed to this kind of behavior commit an act of violence. Columbine caught us, as parents, asleep on the job. Yes, bad things can happen. So let's talk about it and understand why it's a bad idea. At least that's my opinion. If anything, I think a book like this is important for teens to read. Without being preachy or judgmental (which is more than I can say for the folks who filed the complaint), the book demonstrates the consequences of our actions and how frivolous ideas can quickly turn into life changing moments. Life can turn on a dime and doing something uncharacteristic just to "fit in" is simply not worth it. I think it stands up well for a 32 year old book. The story is more relevant today than ever and I believe kids will see themselves in the characters and will encourage critical thinking.  Put this one on your teen's night stand and talk about it together. Read irresponsibly.

Can't Seem To Get Over....Unngh!

It's like this for me every morning.